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Friday 3 February 2012

Madonna linked to the selling of organs as fans find themselves priced out of seeing her live.

It's a given that the Conservative party is out of touch with the reality of most peoples lives, but on a scale of one to ten they probably average around an eight and see the full ten score as something to aspire to.
Meanwhile Madonna has managed to blow their pitiful eight of ten out the water and grabbed the full ten out of ten by charging $300 a ticket for her forthcoming shows and telling Newsweek magazine that people would be advised to "Start saving your pennies now', because “People spend $300 on crazy things all the time, things like handbags. So work all year, scrape the money together, and come to my show. I'm worth it."
Forgive me, but I don't actually personally know anyone who would pay $300 (£190) for a handbag.
Well okay I probably do.
What I mean is I don't know anyone who has the spare cash lying around to buy one, or anyone with the inclination to save all year to do so.
So it's official now.
Madonna and reality have parted ways.
Or have they?
The above opinion of this was one that jerked from my knee, traveled straight to my fingertips and then ended up hammered out on the keyboard, but when I think about it I can see where she's coming from.
In colloquial terms it's still 'ripping the pish', but she is probably right that people will pay that.
In fact they will pay the £190 plus a booking fee and then on the night they will happily hand over the cash to cover their travelling expenses, maybe go for a meal, certainly get a bit tipsy and probably grab a snack on the way home to.
For two people their night with Madonna will cost £500, or more.
It's sort of mind boggling to me, but she's right.
People do spend money on crazy things.
Crazy things like a couple of hours of watching a woman who is in her fifties lip synch and gyrate through an aerobic workout while being caressed by muscularly sculpted gay men in thongs.
I'm guessing about the gay men in thongs, but if they don't make an appearance on a Madonna tour then I suspect that a certain element of her fan base would be rather miffed.
Now that is crazy. That is loco crazeeeee.
Not people being miffed at a Madonna gig sans gay dancers, but the bit about watching a lip synching aerobic workout from her.
So in hindsight, and now that I've managed to get passed my initial reaction, maybe she isn't as delusional and out of touch as I thought, but instead just as immorally greedy and exploitative as a hedge fund banker.
I'm not sure what is worse really.
So I guess it's down to people to send her a message from all of us who are in this together and introduce her to the reality of working hard and getting fuck all for it.
Let here practice her dance routines and work her arse off in rehearsals, and then let her sit and watch the ticket sales remain static.
It will be good for her.
She'll feel closer to her fans.
Honestly.
It really will be for her own good if the tour bombs.
If for some reason someone really needs a fix of Madonna then maybe they could try out the mini tribute act that's Kylie Minogue.
Basically she does the same show for a fraction of the price anyway, and she always guarantees the inclusion of muscularly sculpted gay men in thongs in her show.
Just a thought.

2 comments:

  1. I've long thought Madonna is morally bankrupt this just confirms she's also contemptible.

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  2. I work beside someone who has bought a ticket. I'm sure it'll be a spectacular show with an audience filled with people who'll never pay £3 to see a local band but don't mind paying a fortune to see her.

    As an aside, the guitarist from Prong also plays in Madonna's band.

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