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Sunday, 20 March 2011

My girlfriends crying in the shower stall

Well this is where I should be waxing lyrically about the success of our weekend of playing at being part time promoters.
Instead I'm going to review the gigs separately from the events that surrounded the Friday evening so that I don't taint the exceptional performances with the loathing I'm feeling.
How honest does anyone want this?
Here's the deal.
Kelly and myself book a legend to perform for us.
Glen Matlock played a pivotal role in the Sex Pistols, a band that people to this day claim to have had a seismic effect on modern music as we know it.
He has also played with everyone from Iggy Pop to Primal Scream and more recently The Faces.
A sure fire draw for a venue that only holds 100 people and is situated in the arse end of feckin nowheresville.
People should be biting our arms off to get to see this gig.

In support we had Tragic City Thieves, Filthy Little Secret, Zoe Lewis and a special appearance of Billy Liar.
If anyone cared to check them out then I'm sure that they would be impressed.

However we didn't consider that if we mentioned Glens name then people would magically come along.
Instead we worked our socks off to promote the show.
Posters were designed and printed off and then put up everywhere, the local press ran a bit on page three that was eye catching, and I think people who know me on the social networking sites must have been sick of my continued updates and reminders of the show.
All the bands involved pulled their weight in promoting it to. All of them are beyond criticism.
The venue itself pulled all the stops out. Beefing up their PA and getting in an outstanding young guy on the sound desk was the least of their efforts.
This was text book promotion work.
No angle was missed and everyone involved went above and beyond the call of duty.

Then on the night hardly anyone turned up and left Kelly and myself out of pocket to the tune of £700.
£700 that we don't have.
As the night itself went from bad to worse attendance wise, and then ultimately financially went down like the Titanic I felt physically sick.
There was a hollow sensation in the pit of my stomach that I have never felt before.
I looked over at my girlfriend and when she asked how bad it was and I told her she went white.
Stress lines are now probably permanently marked on her lovely wee face.

This was as bad as it gets.
We scrambled about, rushed out and cleared our bank accounts, and I mean literally cleaned them out leaving us with nothing, friends rallied around and provided loans, and the venue itself stumped up cash to to cover the costs so that we could honour our financial agreement with the band.
That's what you do. There were no contracts, but they had my word and sometimes in life that is all you have. Your word.

What it comes down to is that Glen Matlock and his band honoured their side of the agreement, and maybe even more with a set that no one is likely to forget.
So we had to honour our side. No question about it.
The thing is that while I appreciate all the the people who did attend, and fully understand the reasons why others couldn't. I still feel a great sense of loathing for all the pricks who bleat and moan that nothing ever happens here, and then don't get off their arses to go when there is entertainment of this quality is laid on for them.
This is the bit that I'm struggling to keep bottled up.
Where were all the Pistols fans, music fans, etc?
All the so called punks that I see on a weekly basis strutting up and down the town?
The people who did have the time and money to support the gig.
I've lost count of the times that individually people have approached me since Friday to say that people get the music scene that they deserve.
So I guess Kilmarnock can go back to rock covers bands for free in the corner of a pub, or the obligatory acoustic warbler on an open mic night.
Maybe we don't even deserve that and karaoke will be the highlight for us all.
That's if we can actually manage to pull ourselves away from Britains got the x factor on ice in ballgowns.

My loathing doesn't just extend to these people though.
The apathetic complainers who talk the talk, but fail to walk the walk.
I'm also pissed off with all the young punky guys and gals who hang about on a Saturday in the town centre.
They can manage to shell out £40 odd quid for the latest Kerrang cover star playing in a shed like arena.
Dig deep and cover their travelling costs, even buy some drink and then spend £60 on merch.
They will also wear Sex Pistols t-shirts and have Pistols bags to carry whatever they carry in them, but they can't go and see one play.
In fact they can't go to fuck all unless a mainstream magazine has given the band a sort of seal of approval first.
Fuckin sheeple. Every single one of them.
In fact the can't even manage to drag they skinny black denim encased arses to see four band playing for a fiver in a venue that is within spitting distance of where they pose....I mean congregate.
Am I angry. Of course I fuckin' am.
Angry, embarrassed and skint.
I had to sit across a table from Glen Matlock and apologize that no one seemed to give enough of a fuck to see him after saying earlier that I expected to sell the small venue out.
I have to look into the hollow eyes of my girlfriend and assume some responsibility for this debacle.
I also have to borrow money from my son to survive until pay day.
How does anyone think that makes me feel? I'm borrowing cash to survive from someone who should be dependent on me to look after him.
This was as monumental a fuck up as they come and the finger of blame can only be pointed at those who wallow in their own apathy.
All you armchair fans are a bunch of cunts. Keep moaning, but we aint listening to you.
It's true. If you aint part of the solution you're part of the problem.

One last thing as food for thought. My girlfriend and myself did these gigs as a non profit making venture, a sort of hobby.
We wanted to bring the best talent to our town for people to enjoy and weren't even looking for a slice of the pie.
Everyone who failed to turn up due to no genuine reason at all may as well have just lined up and spat in our faces.


  1. Totally agree mate.
    There seems to be dozens of 'punks' walking about Killie town centre on a saturday afternoon.
    I couldny make it because I had Primal Scream on Friday night.

    Presley were fuckin tremendous last night!

  2. No problem Cass. You're one of the guys keeping it all going and attending shows.
    I've just said to someone else that some people seem to be happy to like a monochrome life, but people like us want the full technicolor shebang.
    Fuck them mate. Them and their drab little fuckin empty lives full of angst about soup shows and bollocks that doesn't really matter.

  3. Wow, that's a rough situation. Sounds like you and your girlfriend didn't get the appreciation you deserve, especially when you are doing them for a non profit venture! Sorry to hear she was crying in the shower stall...

  4. Sorry to hear that Apethetic people always ruin things. From reading your entry here, I can tell that you did everything right. I too would have emptied my bank account to honor the payment. You did the right noble thing to do. A question, did the bands supporting play for free???? Or did they get paid. The reason I ask, is that sometimes bands from a hometown help the traveling band and that would have taken some of the burden off of you and Kel....just thinking out loud. Sorry for you losing money.

  5. Thank you Steam Shower. It's in the past now, but the effects will ripple through locally. Who else will decide to promote anything like this now.
    Not may I would presume.

  6. They were all playing for expences Kenny, and refused to take them from us. All good guys.
    Tragic City Thieves offered Kelly and me the cash in their band account. Filthy Little Secret played two gigs for nothing and last night were buying us drinks. Devilish Presley offered to give us back their fee to.
    In fact all the bands were great.
    Friends have also offered to help out and we are genuinely moved at the amount of support and love shown to us both. It's the silver lining of a very dark cloud.
    We haven't taken the money, but all the offers were very much appreciated as they were rooted in genuine respect for us and what we do.
    I love all these people.
    I could go on.
    In fact I will.
    A guy called John Kerr offered to bail us out, A couple, Joanne and Peter, who we know ran out and got us £140. Chris and Dudge of the venue punted forward another £150.
    Last night mates who were out on a stag night made a point of coming to the gig to offer their support. There's some good people here

  7. that is fucking rotten,what hope does this town have?, a damn shame the cash you had to cough up

  8. karaoke and kebabs. That's Killie for you.

  9. Did you mention Ex Sex Pistols on the poster?. Its amazing how many people that don't know who Glen Matlock, its all Sid Sid Sid.Don't dismiss this a a failure, its merely lack of ignorance due to the people of Kilmarnock, i personally do't think its a geographical factor.Keep the faith

  10. Still in the Pistols when they do play, and yes to posters and everything on the net said Glan Matlock (of The Sex Pistols)
    Supposedly Tuts was a poor turnout. Much of the people left as soon as a punk tribute band finished.

  11. weird that,i just cant get it????,maybe its the ghost of sid,fuck knows!,like i said it aint a failure on your part.

  12. Thats shit!
    Everything else has been said, I'm sorry that happened.

  13. Thanks Jacqui. You're right. Nothing more to be said really.

  14. To be frank,Glen has been in the biz for fuck knows how long.He must know that some gigs of his can be a hit and miss attendance wise,and he aint short of a buck either.An outrage if he asked you to cough up,for god sake you are a parent that has to support his kid

  15. Glen was fine. A nice guy.
    It's just a fact that five guys travelling from London to Scotland for two nights that need to cover accomodation, food etc isn't cheap.
    I would be surprised if they mjade much out of it all.
    He can't be expected to carry the cost of a poor night.
    He honoured his part of the deal and I wouldn't consider making a negative comment about him or his band. They didn't rip anyone off and played their hearts out for us.

  16. its just saddening.When i moved to dunfermline i thought for a second that maybe Kilmarnock would get better. The good old days i miss,Fagin's and the venue at titchfield street.Will these days return?

  17. I doubt that they will return. Every once in a while someone tries to inject a bit of life in the place and the usual faces support it, but then it tails off into nothing again.
    The very sad thing about it all is that there are loads of talented people about looking for an audience.

  18. its all turned into corporate ass licking big shed venue thingys. Everytime i mention i am going to a gig they assume its the fucking SEC or something. Intimate gigs are sometimes viewed by people as some kind of oddity because big show gigs are the only thing they know.

  19. typical response of most "eh where's King Tuts??,a thoat he wis deed" lol

  20. Yep. The big gig is sometimes the only live entertainment people know. How do they think the bands they loved got to play these places. By playing the toilets first.

  21. Exactly,lol,they are just ignorant to the fact that to get a band to the top,they have to see them in a humble venue. Like i said,its due to damn ignorance. But as we speak, the SEC attendance numbers are not as what they used to be,and to rectify this they built the auditorium next to it,and i admit,a cracking venue and the audio quality is like a small venue, none of this cavernous echoing bass rumble the SEC has. The point of this is,small intimate gigs need to be done,and is benefical to the fans and the artist,The intimacy and the sound,blah blah blah

  22. I dont mind cry in the shower but i cant belive i have now got fucking wrikles now, thanks killie it will be fucking remembered,

    And i want to say thankss to everyone that helped out and offered to help us it i was and is much apperated.

    And a big thank you to all the folk that made the effort to get the backsides of the couches and come down and support it.

    woops for got to say cheers to all that played xx


  23. Fuckin hell Balboa!, its time to hear mickey's voice in your head and fight the manufactured big shed gigs ad x-factor mentality.Fight! Fight Fight!!!!,support your local scene, keep it up guys!!!!!!!!!!!

  24. That really sucks - I hope you both get over it (both financially and mentally) in time. It's an all too familiar scenario though and it's exactly this that puts me off promoting gigs up here. Being a "regular" gig-goer I have plenty of contacts on the bands' side and the venues, but the unpredictability of Joe Public makes it too much of a risk for me. As another former Pistol once said. "I've met the man in the street and he's a cunt."

    I've come to the conclusion that the likes of me and you, for whom the music does truly run in our veins, are something of an oddity these days and are thinner on the ground than you might imagine.

  25. You are probably right.
    I have went from saying that I will never do it again to slipping back to a smaller scale and see how it goes.
    I think I will promote a small night of three quys playing acoustically I know for three quid with it all going to them.
    I'm in the lucky position that I have a venue available to me to do this, but I will admit that I feel like I have suffed a KO blow.

  26. Just noticed that I said soup shows to Cass. Obviously I'm not having a dig at those who want to watch Jamie Oliver rustle up a starter, but instead it's a dig at those who can't miss shite like Hollyoaks even though they have skyplus.

  27. i see the chickens have come home to roost

  28. I was going to comment about the 'chickens home to roost' post, but maybe I'm taking it the wrong way. What's the deal?