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Friday 30 December 2011

Manly bands for manly men. Part one.

Some French guy playing an immortal Scotsman once said "there can be only one".
I reckon that if he was talking about rock bands it would have to have been AC/DC he was referring to.
(Bon Scott era obviously)
If anyone wants to hear what testosterone sounds like, then just slip on any AC/DC track with Bon howling over it, and that's the sound nailed.
If you gave cavemen guitars then this is what you would get.
A noise that harkens back to a period when men who were in touch with their feminine sides were called poofs*.
It's the aural equivalent of clubbing a prospective partner over the head and dragging her home to look at your cave paintings while you take her from behind.
It's sex with no empathy for a partners needs.
It's all about pleasing yourself and then hitting the road to hunt down another conquest.
Yeah it's most definitely an outdated attitude, and it's certainly selfish, but who cares. (Joke)
It's a damn sight more honest an attitude than hiding behind the empathy mask.
(yes, your needs are important to me darling)

If we are really honest you could deconstruct a metro sexual male, peel back his sensitive nature, drag his inner being to the surface, and what you will find is a beer monster that wants to corrupt every woman to the accompaniment of "If you want blood, you got it".
Guys might lie about it, but that's just denial.
A bastard is lurking deep within us all.
There are two types of men I suppose. The ones that know who they are and hide the fact, and the ones that are so pussy whipped that they think their dicks are for pissing out of and nothing else.
So this is where AC/DC come in.
The perfect band for all men.
You can put the needle on the vinyl and let the mask slip and get comfy, or you can get your pussy whipped buddy around and use it to regress him to a more natural state of existence.
If you've a mate that has been taken over by a cult, then just kidnap the sad sack and lock him in a room with AC/DC blasting at his ass 24/7.
No need for someone to sit there and slowly remind him that his family love him and everyone misses him day in day out.
Just let AC/DC rip, and after a couple of days he'll step out of the room, ask for a beer and grope the first women walking past.
Even if it's your mother.
Problem solved.
That's what AC/DC are all about.
It's all unapologetic balls to the wall stuff. A mans band. The living it large and to hell with the consequences attitude to the fore.
Masters of their own destiny and their destiny is to party hard. Fuck yeah.
Bloody attractive aint it? That's because they appeal to something deep in men.
They are the kings of cock rock.
I will not be ashamed. I will stand tall and proud and shout "AC/DC, HELL YEAH".
And they play bagpipes to.
*No disrespect to the gay community here. You can listen to AC/DC as well

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